I have decided that today I am going into remission.
That means that this is the last time you're going to see what Lyme Disease- no, wait- what Multi Systemic Infectious Disease Syndrome (that's what we're calling it now) looks like. At least in my life. It's been a terror and a mess. It's a bore and I'm done with it. A cure, as in the complete eradication of the disease-causing agent, feels so complex and improbable that right now I will settle for remission. I mean, think about it, we're attacking this thing over and over and over- it's bacterial, it's fungal, it's viral, it's a parasite- in order to achieve the cure and yet nobody knows for certain if a cure is even possible.
But I'm starting to feel better now, I'm starting to feel as if I'm inching towards remission. So maybe that's what I've been after all along- reaching the point where I can coexist with this thing. Forever. Maintenance and monitoring and medicine for the rest of my life. Or until they come up with something better.
Anyway, here is what it looked like on a bad day. Here it is even though I don't want you to see it, exactly. I just don't want to forget it. This is important for me to remember.